#30 – Random7, or Genie in a Bottle

 

Do you want to have some fun?  Are you just saying you want to have fun, or do you really want to have fun?

My posts are getting pretty heavy.  I thought I’d try something different.  The 7 or so people that read this blog seem to like these Random posts – a real crowd pleaser.  So let’s go!  (As always, I make no guarantees that I’m not repeating myself.  I suppose I could go back and look at the past 6 but eh….whatever.)

263.  Some advice – if you are ever granted 3 wishes from a genie in a bottle or lamp, your first wish always, ALWAYS, must be for unlimited wishes.  You’re welcome.

264.  To the people that only want to say ‘Merry Christmas’ – settle down.  ‘Happy Holidays’ is perfectly fine and is all inclusive and it really shouldn’t bother you that much.

265.  To all the people who don’t want people to say ‘Merry Christmas’ –  believe me I get it.  But maybe we should relax on it a little bit.  There are other battles to be fought – we cam get to that one down the road.

266.  I’ve changed my mind on #168.  I’ll play music as loud as I want.  Roll your window up if you don’t like it.  And I see you looking at me but I do not care.

267.  I’ve always liked the Beastie Boys.  I think their song Sure Shot is super cool – smooth.  I didn’t realize until recently that they name checked Rod Carew, one of the best and most underrated hitters in baseball history.  Made the song even cooler.

268.  Who is Sam Hill, and what, if you don’t understand something, did people (used) to say ‘What in the Sam Hill?’

269.  In addition to a cape, I think I’d like to get a cane and maybe a top hat.  Not a curved cane though, one of those straight fancy ones.  The ensemble would be my fancy wear for important events like weddings and funerals.

270.  Do you know where the term ‘bulldozer’ comes from?

http://www.worldwidewords.org/qa/qa-bul2.htm

271.  And ‘Head for the Hills’?  If it’s going down, why the hills?  Is it safer?

272.  Do you say ‘coo-pon’ or ‘que-pon’?  If you say the latter, what is wrong with you?

273.  I think they should make a prequel series to the Brady Bunch.  I really want to know what happened to Carols first husband and to Mikes first wife.  What’s the deal there?

274.  On the Brady Bunch, they only address the fact that the kids are step-kids and that Mike and Carol are step-parents to each other’s kids one time.  After that, it was just Mom and Dad.

275.  Are you aware of the Mandela Effect?  It’s probably not a real thing.  But (and this is true) I’ve felt for most of my life that there have been two female pitchers that have played major league baseball.  They played for either the Seattle Mariners or one of the Canadian teams.  They played in the late seventies.  One was left-handed I think and one was a submarine -type pitcher where the arm angle comes from underneath.  Neither one of them threw very hard – they relied on breaking pitches and control.  They were middle relief pitchers and did not play for very long.  They weren’t great but they weren’t awful either.  It’s weird to me that this didn’t happen because of the details I remember and that for the longest time it just felt like a fact and was not that big a deal.  I’m not sure I’ve ever told anyone about that and it seems real and super weird all at once.

276.  This is a cool little documentary series on Netflix I recently watched.  I like history and the etymology of things and it was super interesting.  I love Netflix.

277.  If I were to rank my all-time favorite MC’s, Chuck D would be #1.  I think I’d listen to him rap the phone book.

278.  These library boxes are everywhere in my neighborhood.  Is it only a Milwaukee thing or do other cities have them?  I like the idea and maybe I’ll get one.  But the ones I’ve seen never have any good books, and I’ve never seen anyone take a book out of one.  I’d want to put some cool books in mine but wouldn’t want anyone to take all my cool books.library-boxes

279.  I don’t know how they do it in your city, but Milwaukeeans have this habit of not going around people that are turning left.  So, a car is stopped waiting to turn left.  The car behind will stop too, waiting for the car to turn so they can go straight.  Instead of going around, they just sit there.  Cars line up behind, not knowing the first car is waiting to turn left.  So we all just sit there like assholes, not knowing what is going on in front of us.  The whole thing could have been avoided if the first car had just gone around.  It’s really upsetting.  What do they do that?  If you do that, what in the Sam Hill are you waiting for?  Go around!!

280.  I don’t think this is an original question, but it bears asking again – why the Braille at drive up ATM’s?  Have they been anticipating self-driving cars all of this time?

281.  Libraries don’t use card catalogs anymore, do they?  They can’t, what with computers and all.

282.  ‘Akimbo’ is an odd word.  Can ‘akimbo’ be separated from ‘arms’, as in ‘arms akimbo’?  If so, please use it in a sentence for me because I don’t see any other use for the word.

283.  It’s odd to me that Superman flies like he’s lying down.  He’s Superman – I don’t think he needs to make himself aerodynamic.  I think if I could fly I’d fly like I was standing up.  Also, he never flies sideways.

284.  I love comics and superhero movies, but I think we’re reaching an oversaturation point, or at least I am.

285.  I want to be part of the Zeitgeist, but have never been 100% sure of what that means.

286.  It’s somewhere in the Constitution that we are afforded a fair and speedy trial.  I don’t know that either one of those things happen anymore, if they ever did.  Also, I’d like a better definition of cruel and unusual punishment.

287.  Sports though – I think that grown men screaming and throwing tantrums because the do not like the way a official made a call is kind of infantile and ridiculous.  Act like a grown up.

288.  Brad Pitt is my favorite actor.  There, I’ve said it.

289.  Have I mentioned the famous Midwest racer Dick Trickle?  If I have, it bears repeating.  He was a car racer/driver, and his real name was Dick Trickle and that is awesome.

290.  My three favorite authors are Kurt Vonnegut, Ray Bradbury, and Margaret Atwood.  My three favorite books are ‘The Martian Chronicles’, ‘Slaughterhouse Five’, and ‘A Handmaid’s Tale.’

291.  I used to tell people I’m like a duck.  Smooth sailing on the surface, but paddling furiously underneath just to try and get anywhere.  I don’t feel like that so much anymore.  Just once in a while.

292.  The best thing I have ever heard is when my daughter sings to herself when she doesn’t think anyone is listening.  She’s not a particularly good singer, but when she sings softly to herself it melts me.  She used to do it more when she was younger.  I’d listen in – I couldn’t always make out the lyrics but that didn’t really matter.  She does it sometimes now when she’s in the shower.  I wish I had a recording of it.  It’s just about the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard.

293.  There’s more but I can’t always remember.  As soon as I hit ‘publish’ I’ll remember more I wanted to say.  I write a lot of them down but then can’t find where I wrote it, or can’t read my own handwriting.  But remember, three wishes, the first one has to be unlimited wishes.  Once you get them, don’t screw it up, ok?

That’s it jerks.  Now go have some Merry Holiday fun!

 

Xmas Pig!!

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4 thoughts on “#30 – Random7, or Genie in a Bottle

  1. Regarding #266 referencing #168 – don’t you want to be able to hear your daughter and any significant person in her life when you’re 70?
    #268 – (I loved this one, Mr. Awesome!)
    A possible origin for the phrase “Sam Hill” is the surveyor Samuel W. Hill (1819–1889). Hill allegedly used such foul language that his name became a euphemism for swear words.
    #270 – I must share this one with the parents of my “charges” that are crazy about bulldozers!
    #271 – The hills are easier to defend – plenty of high ground, rocks to hide behind, valleys to outflank your enemies from. (But of course you can get isolated and “stuck” there too!) But if it’s a flood – best place to be!
    #275 – Hadn’t heard of it but then I read about it after seeing your blog. Interesting especially since all new to me! AND I would have SWORN that it was Berenstein!!!!! I STILL can’t believe it even after seeing it in print.
    #278 – O.P. has them. Well, maybe put one of your cool books there. Who knows? You could start a trend. (I agree with you though – most people are dumping books there that not too many people want to read – except for the kids’ books – lots of good ones of those!)
    #279 – had a good laugh – does NOT happen here (usually)
    #281 – answer is no – haven’t been there in a while?
    #282 – apparently it can be used with legs as well
    #285 – you absolutely can be part of it without even trying but “it depends” – you have to be willing to accept “the defining spirit or mood of a particular period of history” BUT my question is: who is doing the defining???
    #287 – YES!!
    #288 – seriously?
    #291 – YEAH!
    #292 – OK – you “had me” on this one – had to copy and paste it for myself – a most lovely image – both her action and your reaction – THANKS!
    #293 – I will NEVER forget the “three wishes” advice -hope I get the chance to use it!

    And finally, is the joke on me? You know all this stuff already before you post, correct? And mine are superfluous, right! But you’re “learnin” me “sumpin” anyway!! 🙂

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